One,

It’s all alone and quiet,
But isn’t that all you’ve ever wanted?
You hated the noise; could it be?
You struggled with depth and vulnerability,
You crave less responsibility,
But of what are you accountable for?
There are no emotions in the public eye. Remember?
Yet you cry behind closed white doors,
Wishing and needing just one person to lend their ear,
Would it be something worthy to hear?
But wishing and needing can be quite similar things as we can see,
Yet you ignore the pounding of utter infatuation,
You take your confidence,
And produce loneliness,
You open your mouth,
Push your hands to an infinite pale sky,
You sob down,
Still craving that ONE person,
But who will be there?
It’s all alone and quiet,
But isn’t that all you’ve ever wanted?

-----
It literally took me just ten minutes to write this real poem. When you experience something release it. This is my release. But I will not victimize myself because I have to be strong! Yet still showing my vulnerability to all of you with this, and letting go. I have to provide an example to all of you and many others that enduring a sense of pain is only temporary and will only be pain, if you allow it to repeat. Realize who you are and show yourself who that is. We shall embark on an adventure, or haven't we already began? It's called life. If you stumble, don't whimper, get back up, because you have a path of success to walk to. Because you can. Don't feel sympathetic for yourself, grow from it and take it as an example and tell yourself that it will never happen again. You will NEVER be where you were, that day(s).

I believe in you.

--daviduh.

Vulnerability,

may be perhaps, my biggest flaw. Just the thought of letting someone in, and kicking myself out is terrifying to me. I hate to have anyone feel sympathetic, because I feel so many have been through much more than what I have. I am not trying to have you feel sorry me as you read that last sentence. What I am trying to say is that, there are SO many stories beyond mine that really mean something. There are people that have bounced back and are happy. I have issues, as do all of us in our right minds.

The reason I am so defensive about my stories is because they spark up memories, which make them the past. I am glad they are in the past. I get so emotional when such things are brought back up, and I do not want anyone to think any different of me. Think of me as how I am, now what I have been through, because me going through what I have gone through, there are a million more out there.

My flaw is not an over-nighter. It will not just be solved. I am obstinate, and tend to reflect on such negative things that they keep me up all night. It is truly hard to give myself advice, but I have it.

I must let go, do whatever it may be to relief me of my past pain. You see, me dwelling on such topics from my past, will enter into my present and future and will hold me back. If I want to help others, I must start with myself first. If I do not speak of such problems to anyone, there may be just ONE person who needed to hear it. Hear that I'm there for them, and that I've been through it. I mustn't care what others say or think, for it will also hold me back, thus leaving me where I began this writing.

My tough exterior may look intimidating, but inside I am quite a sensitive person, as are many. I need to overcome the hinderances and bounce back up. I must show that at times, I can be depressed and I can speak about it. I can confide, whether it be in a friend, or this here writing. I need to get it out.

My message for you if you're going through the same, don't bottle it in. I know you have probably heard it from a teacher or a councelor, but think of it as this, if you keep all this vulnerability inside your weakening defense blocker of a body, you will always be stuck with it. You will not graduate from yourself, which means you aren't in control of yourself. It is up to you to release such stresses on you because if you do not, who will? Although it sounds extremely negative, you cannot seek help without defining the problem itself.

Look at the person and the mirror, face to face, let your guard down. You are a hero. You are an impact on this world. Your struggles, whatever they may be, are others struggle. Don't hide from yourself. You are your biggest role model. You have everything to live for. Breath in, breath out...

Release.

--daviduh.

These Shoes,

I walk down the ever so long sidewalk,
I hear their laughs,
I see their glares,
I smile and say, "You couldn't last a day in these shoes."
They growl, they grin,
Yet they wouldn't know where to begin,
They'd trudge, they'd whine,
And at last, I couldn't claim those shoes mine,
I'd pay the fine,
These shoes,
With their tearing patches, brokeness, and discoloration,

The sols even hold a bit of deterioration,
These shoes which have climbed, ran, and wreak of mother nature's sweet night fall,
Can they make it, or will they stall?
Yet I am not answered, for I am to but know,
That someday I will grow,
And find a dream of my own,
I wonder why everything is unknown,
However all I know is these shoes are mine,
And I look back down to the sidewalk,
I hear them snicker,
I sense their glares,
I smile and say, "You couldn't last a day in these shoes."
-----
Lately I have become more attached to the thoughts I can express in poetry. How I can perceive my thoughts in a metaphoric way enthralls me. I've been obsessed with reading the poems of my favorite poet, Emily Dickinson. I am but inspired to write my thoughts out. I want to impact all of you in a way. I want you to feel the sense of love and care and "I've been there" moments with me. We are one, we are united, we are together. So I strongly tell you to pursue your dreams in this reading, you can do it! I am shouting it out to you, I have faith in you. Confide in yourself, or a piece of paper, or do what you love. You got everything to gain, and nothing to lose, nothing, for you have the power...

--daviduh.